I’ve been thinking lately about how a relationship with God starts. I think the beginning of it is one of the most beautiful parts of the entire relationship. I didn’t think of mine as really anything special at the time, but when you can look back on it later you can see that He was pursuing me way before I was ever seeking Him out. Way back in teenage years, on Bourbon St or some random club, at whatever time, doing who knows what, and God was there with me. I didn’t know back then what His presence felt like, but it’s a feeling I know well now. Memories of times of such confusion, being lost in what was going on, and knowing that there has to be more to life than this, and I could feeling Him calling for me to come to Him. Again, I didn’t realize that was Him at the time, but He was there, patiently waiting for me to see Him so He could get me out of where I was.
I just think it’s so beautiful because He finds us and wants us exactly where we are. He doesn’t wait until we get ourselves together. He doesn’t wait until we figure everything out. He sees us and loves us right in the middle of whatever mess we may have gotten ourselves in. He loves us right in the middle of whatever addiction we can’t seem to quit. He loves us right in the middle of whatever bad relationship we can’t seem to let go of. He loves us right in the middle of our lack of belief in Him. You name it, and He will unconditionally love us and seek a relationship with us in it.
I’ve had so many back & forths and failures in the maybe 15 years of starting my relationship with God. There’s a huge portion of those 15 years where really I was not living right by Him at all and still falling into old behaviors BUT He loved me through it all and never left me. Even when I left Him. He knows our destinies. He knows the potential we hold inside that we have so much trouble seeing. He sees it ALL. He sees way beyond our mistakes.
Don’t ever think that you have to be better before God can love you. He loves you with a love deeper than your understanding. He loves your yesterday, He loves you today in this moment, and His love never stops. His love is patient and gentle. Never forceful. His love will pursue you ALL the days of your life.
“And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Ephesians 3:18-19
“Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the Lord forever.” Psalm 23:6
“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow – not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below – indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39